Don’t get me wrong, I’ve made statements and have alluded to it before, but it was always under the guise of an aesthetic. Which I admit 100% I am drawn to the aesthetic, but there has always been something deeper as well.
Making my declaration on our instagram account seemed safe and small, because our following is still baby new and those that follow us are there because they have interest in what we are doing. It still seems too personal and strange of an announcement to post it on my own personal account as that account is is very much dedicated to body positivity and plus size fashion.
I guess I worry that I will alienate or push away people that are there for another reason. Which makes sense, I have straight up hightailed it out of an account I was considering to follow if it has any mention of Jesus in their bio. I think sometimes religion or spiritually should generally be a personal story that doesn’t need to be advertised to every passer by. Like, I can’t be the only one who violently rolls their eyes at soapbox evangelists or even gets straight up pissed off by them.
But even still, I feel compelled to share my story. But I know there is a right time and a right place to do so and what better place than this safe haven we have created here, dedicated to us finding ourselves and accepting a truth we have long known. I would even like this to act as perhaps the first entry into a series of personal stories of “coming out of the broom closet” as Michelle so eloquently puts it.
I find it hard to believe I am the only person that feels self conscious about admitting myself as a witch. There are so many assumptions that go along with it that I do find I let myself worry about what those assumptions may be from any given person. But what I need to remember and hold dear to myself is how I feel about it.
And I have to admit, it feels right. It feels like I am finally embracing the compass that has been pulsating so hard in this direction, but I would continue to ignore it.
I am not a religious soul. I tried when I was a child, but it never fit. I tried atheism too, but it didn’t sit well either. In the end I settled on my own hodgepodge system of fantasy and imagination that seemed right to me, but I would never tell a soul, worried I’d be made fun of.
What Michelle and I have discussed is a sort of natural call to being a witch. No parameters or guidelines set in place we need to subscribe or adhere to. Just doing what feels natural.
What is natural to me is my belief in energy, that it can manifest in many ways. I have a scientifically based mind and a mystical heart, which can be hard to resolve. I have referred to this as my Mulder/Scully complex, I want to believe, but I also want tangible evidence to solidify my belief. When I let it all settle down to one thing both sides can agree on it’s energy.
I believe the energy, vibes and positive thoughts I put into creating something make it all that much better. I think it yields greater results. A non witch might just think it’s the power of positive thinking or being determined, but I am a little romantic and I as much as I agree upon those sentiments, I think it’s all a little magic in the making.
I think there is magic all around us, and it stands right before us, plan and simple. It shows itself to me in how foods pair together to make them sing, like mushrooms and garlic sauteed in butter. Or how lemon and ginger steeped with honey can make you feel better when you are sick. If you look at it through witch coloured glasses, isn’t that a simple potion for healing? That mix of ingredients placed together in order for you to heal and feel better, how is that not a witches brew?
And so goes my thinking for many everyday things that we glaze over. And it also goes with the silly little magical indulgences many see as normal. I bet you know your zodiac sign!
So here I am, letting the world know, even if it’s not being shouted from the mountain tops, that I am finally accepting this truth of mine. I am actively trying to shake off any shame I may feel when I get into woo woo magical thinking.
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